Monday July 28, 2008

I worked from home today because I had finally made a Dr Appt for a Physical....I haven't been feeling great for such a long time - tired, can't sleep, crying, and heart palpitations. My Blood Pressure is high, and after taking a little quiz it looks like I am suffering from depression - so, now I have blood pressure meds, depression med's and medicine for the awful Migraine Headaches. The Dr did a EKG and it looked OK - but she did find that my Carotid Artery was not making the "swishing" noise its supposed to make. So I have to go and have a Ultra Sound to see if its full of crap! OH CRAP! I also went and had a Chest X-Ray to see if everything is OK. I am a smoker (I've quit many times) you would think after seeing my Dad go through so much because of smoking (he had clogged arteries and he also develped Aterial Scerosis) - he has lost both legs because of the disease that I would have quit smoking on the spot. I have tired the patches, gum, hypnosis, acupuncture and the magnets for the ear - nothing works for very long.... So if anybody knows how I can quit please let me know. so, all in all it looks like I am falling apart! Lets hope things get better!

A Cloudy BUT Beautiful Saturday!

Today is Saturday, July 5th and it is a cloudy day but still lovely! Every day that I am alive is a good day. I have been so sad for so many months that I have decided to pack that away and start living my life again. I started working in my garden this summer and it looks beautiful! I am very proud of it!
I think that instead of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself that my Mom is gone I need to start making her proud of how I can carry on with my life.

One sad thing is that my husband and I planned to go on our yearly cruise with my son Jeff and his wife Heather but it has been a bad year for us - my husband Bob is retired and the money just isn't here - with the cost of gas going to $4.29 a gallon here in CT and the price of electricity, food, etc we just cannot justify using $3,000 to go away for a week. To have my pet sitter take care of my four animals would cost us $300, plus the cost of airfare - it just won't work for us. I am sad that we can't go but I think I will go to Florida during that time and see Dad! Life is good, my Dad is doing so well (I know he has sad times but he is carrying on) I am so proud of him!

My big wish is that we could win the Lotto - how I dream about not having to work, or worry about bills. How cool it would be to be able to do what I want when I want! I guess I should buy some tickets (Can't win if you don't play!)

My wish for today is that everyone be happy and enjoy life!!